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With Hitler By My Side...I once kept a Hitler by my side
He was my little pet i had to hide
On the floor of my room he would rant and scream
While I stared at the scamp and would laugh and beam
i had no idea of what he said
i just loved to watch him wave his arms and turn red
In my closet is where he would sleep
curled up in a ball, counting flaming sheep
He was my secret pet that no one knew...
Hidden away like Anne Frank, only not a girlish Jew
All was good, and all was swell
Until i brought him for show and tell
My teachers gasped; my classmates shrieked
They called my parents who damn well freaked
My parents yelled and said he had to go
"He's a freaking Nazi, dont ya know!"
So i cried and i pleaded
My little Adolph i dearly needed
But they took him to the pound and put him in a big cage
Where he was holed up with a racially pure Rottwieler named Paige
And so that was the last i saw of my beloved German pet
Last i heard, he had a date with the vet.
He was a loss i will always dwell
but I'm sure he's happy n
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